Hard times and Blessings in disguise

I found out a few weeks ago that John is deploying again. :( He has only been home for 4 months. I know he's only gone for 3-4 months at a time, which is way better than 15 months. I just hate that he leaves all the time. When he goes this time, he will be missing 7 months out of this year. That's alot! I would understand them sending him if he hasn't deployed for a whole year but he just got back. And I am really pissed at the situation. I love the Air Force and it has been so good to us, but I honestly don't know how much more I can take. It is so had being responsible for everything, and having to be mom and dad. I don't think it would be so hard if I was closer to my family, but I live in frickin japan land. I love Okinawa but it definately has it's draw backs. I'm just lucky enough to have a great support system from my friends out here. I don't know what I would do without them. They have saved my sanity countless times! :D John has 5 years left on his enlistment and neither of us know if we should make a carrer out of it. We both keep leaning towards no. I want to be able to live next to our families and let our kids grow up around their grandparents. I want to build my own house. I want to know that John is always gonna come home to us every night and be there forever. I don't want to worry about his next deployment, or if I'm ever gonna see him again. I want John to always be around for Crew, and see him grow up. If John keeps deploying like this we're never gonna have another kid because he's not home long enough to make a baby!! LOL :D I just want to be able to focus on us and nothing else. I know it would be hard if he got out, but at least John would come home to us every night. If I could have that, nothing else would matter. Now don't get me wrong, I'm thankful for everything I have. I'm thankful for the military because without it, we wouldn't be where we are today. I have so many wonderful things. I always know there is going to be a paycheck coming in, and I know there is always a roof over my head. I think I just want to start another chapter and see what else is out there. John wants to fly so bad. So I guess we'll just see where this 5 years takes us and make a decision when it gets closer.